4 Reasons Why You Stop Yourself Getting Support After Redundancy

I’m constantly surprised at how so many people try to deal with job loss and redundancy on their own.

One of the first questions I ask clients who have recently been laid off is: 

“So who knows about it? Have you announced your redundancy to every single person in your personal and professional network..?”

On average, only about 30% of people say ‘yes’ - the other 70% have often not told many people at all - even several week’s after being laid off.

When I ask why - they usually say “oh, I err, just haven’t….” - but I usually know what’s going on. When I ask further questions and probe, there are some common reasons for not telling others about their situation.

Here are 4 of the most common reasons why people are shy about sharing news about their job loss - along with my usual responses:

1. “I feel embarassed..”

As an ex recruiter - both within recruitment consultancy and an in-house corporate HR recruiter, I can assure you that there is no longer a stigma with getting laid off these days.

It’s old fashioned to think only poor performers lose their jobs. Most of the people who are losing their jobs at the moment are being laid off for reasons outside their control.  You probably lost your job due to wider economic and financial problems - not because you’re rubbish. So quit feeling embarassed.

And if you do come across people (contacts, potential employers, recruiters) who do look down at you because you’ve been laid off - that’s their issue, not yours.  It’s their loss, so just move on with your head held high.

2. “I don’t know what to say…”

You don’t have to say much at all. Just tell them what’s happened so that they know what’s happening to you.

Just think, if one of you’re friends got engaged or had a baby and didn’t tell you about it, how would you feel? In the same vain, don’t let your friends and professional contacts find out through the grapevine. Send a short email (DO NOT attach a resume) - stick to the facts and tell them what’s happened, give them your personal email address and mobile number so that they have your new details. And that’s it (for now).

3. “I dont want people who I’ve not contacted in a while to think I’m only now getting in touch because I want something..” (i.e. a new job)

I’m not suggesting you spam your friends your resume with a “help me find a job” note.

I’m asking you to just inform the people you have a relationship with about a change in your life.  Don’t you inform people when you move house? In the same way, informing others of a change in your work situation is very normal behaviour.

I suggest you don’t send your resume initially and don’t ask for anything. If you have people reply back and ask you to send through your details,  that’s great - do it. But initially, don’t send out your details to anyone apart from your very warm contacts.

Informing others allows you to reconnect with others - yes, this may then lead onto an email exchange about potential job leads. But may not. But you don’t have relationships with others just because you want something.

4. “I don’t really know what I want to do next” / “I’m going to take some time out, so there’s no point in contacting people yet”

Read my comments under point 3 again. You’re not informing people because you want something. You’re informing people because that’s how we cultivate relationships - by sharing our news. By sharing information and ideas (E.g, what am I doing right now? I’m sharing information and ideas with you - and in the process building a relationship with readers such as yourself).

Cultivating relationships is what you need to do when you’re out of work

Why?

a) Because during a recession, networking is the single best way to find job opportunities. (You can't tap into that network if no one knows about your situation)

b) Because being out of work gives you a great window of time to reconnect with people you’ve lost contact with (and at our core, connection is what we all want - it's a basic human need)

c) Because the ideas and suggestions you need to deal with the ”I don't know what to do next” challenge will often come from the people in your network that know you best

d) Because your friends, family and contacts are the people who you will lean on when you have a bad day (which, you can be sure you will have at some point over the coming weeks)

e) Because these are the people who can help you let your hair down and a have laugh occassionally (and who doesn't need that right now).

So if you’ve been laid off recently , please do yourself a favour and don’t keep it a secret. Send out some emails or a make a few calls to friends, family, colleagues, clients, vendors, brokers, suppliers - all the people you have a relationship with. You”ll be surprised with the flurry of supportive responses that will come back to you.  

Responses that will show you that you don’t have to deal with everything on your own. And that the only thing stopping you getting support isactually YOU...

 Sital Ruparelia from 6 Figure Career Management 

Comments

[Brian Turner]

Its at this time that you realize how good or not so good your networking skills have been when you were employed. I found out that mine were not so hot. I didn't have a lot of people to notify without saying something like, "Hey, remember me from last year? Well,...."

So, the experience has taught me the lesson to keep up my network of contacts and be a regular at touching base. Given the direction the work environment is heading, its likely we'll need our networks even more in the future.

[Sital]

Brian, Thanks for commenting.

Just remember the currency of networking is generosity, it's about what you want (leads, contacts, job), but about what you can contribute. So if you're trying to re-connect with people you've lost touch with - focus on them, not you and what your looking for.

Ask yourself, what can I do to help xyz person? What can you send that that they'd value? Is it an article on a subject of they're interest in, a LinkedIn recommedation or simply a joke that appeals to their dry sense of humour? Make the emails personalised, relevant and focussed on the other person and you'll be able to get over the fact that you've been out of contact. All the best

[Sital]

Ooops, missed word 'NOT' in sentence in last comment. So it should have read:

"Just remember the currency of networking is generosity, it's NOT about what you want (leads, contacts, job), but about what you can contribute.

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